We come into mid January and most people are feeling down about breaking their new years resolutions. They get angry, then they give up. Happens to most of us. I struggle every year just to think of one, let alone stick to it. So this year I have changed things up. Instead of a resolution list, I have a 2019 Bucket List. A list of things I want to do this year. No pressure on reaching deadlines or I have had some very stressful years so I don’t need to be putting even more pressure on myself. Fuck that.
I have already ticked off two things from my bucket list – open savings accounts for all my kids and start a holiday fund. The kids savings account are with a separate bank to mine, so no chance of withdrawing funds as nothing is linked to online banking. Thanks to lovely social anxiety, I struggle to deal with people so I’m not inclined to actually enter the bank to withdraws funds. It was hard enough just walking in and setting the accounts up. I have the traditional Aussie holiday saving fund – the oversized $50 money tin on to of the microwave. All coins are going in there and it is not to be opened until full. Whatever is in there decides where we go on holiday to this year. A family holiday being another item on the bucket list.
I have some personal challenges on the list too. I really want to get back into my writing so getting a proper story outline down would be great. I wouldn’t mind doing some freelance writing as well though that isn’t a necessity. I might even write a short story as an intro to a potential novel. Completing three new paintings is a must, I only have two that I currently like. We are our worst critics after all. I will get a proper veggie garden planted this year. I already have a kick ass herb garden doing very well, even with the awful weather we have had lately.
Time management is a skill I hope to develop further this year. Finding the time to get everything done can be difficult for me. Often things get forgotten about so others can be accomplished. Like the massive washing pile in the bathroom and equally massive folding pile in the lounge room. I will get to the bottom of them one day. I hope. Aside from getting on top of household chores and paperwork, I hope to spend more time appreciating my family. My kids are amazing little beings even though they drive me to distraction. I may have threatened to try and get a refund as they were obviously faulty. But life passes us by so fast, I don’t want to miss to much of them growing up. I need to spend more time with my grandparents. Most of my fondest memories from childhood involve time spent with them on the farm. I want my kids to have some of those experiences too.
Essentially, I want to be more present in my life. I don’t want to keep sitting on the sidelines, too fatigued and depressed to do anything. This year is for me x